The Lindsay Chronicles

Sammy Becomes Buzz Lightyear

2010-09-06T17:58:00.000-07:00

Bad Boys

2009-06-24T21:15:00.000-07:00

If Sam were better versed in American jurisprudence, or perhaps in the insurance industry jargon of his grandfather, he might have been able to craft a worthwhile defense for why he was on the table. He could have cited the principle of 'attractive nuisance' in regards to the Nilla wafers and how we pretty much asked him to clamber atop the table to access them.

Thankfully, Sam as a two year old could only resort to trying to charm his mother. His charms only managed to delay his punishment and revocation of Nilla privileges for the length of time it took for Annie to take this picture.

Ben, too, was has been up to no good. He's recently discovered that the grate to the fireplace isn't properly locked. This isn't so much a discipline issue with Ben, seeing as he's only acting out the natural curiosity of his natural eight-month-old self. It's a safety issue. Not for Ben or us, since there's nothing he can do to the actual fireplace settings. Rather, it's the equipment's safety I'm concerned about. Things with hinges rarely survive long in the presence of a wee bairn.

Eating French Fries

2009-06-19T22:55:00.000-07:00

One last post involving Discovery Kingdom (in June at least). We were in the Thomas the Train section when I noticed some motion near the garbage can next to me. Looky what I found...

...a squirrel preparing to glean what he could from the waste we humans so casually discarded.

The beast was intrepid. He made several dives, each time coming up with another french fry. He was bold, too, flaunting both his fearlessness at my close proximity and the possibility of raised cholesterol levels. I named him Frenchie. He was unimpressed.

Posing With Sharks

2009-06-18T22:33:00.000-07:00

Kate is the consummate poser, in the best sense. I can't catch her at a bad time. She's always ready to strike a pose. More often than not, though, she asks me to get the camera out and snap some shots. Even if there's no good reason.

For instance, here she is with the boys during breakfast. Can you ask for a more mundane setting? Yet, she manages to infuse her charm into the scene (I just realized that the mirror over her head reveals that I have no reflection -- don't tell Annie).

Or how about when she's engrossed watching the Shouka show? Nope, a quick shout to her, and she's got a quick-draw smile ready. Her twin (conjoined?) looks on, unconcerned with the camera.

But what about the Shark Experience? She stood next to the shark jaws and asked me to take a picture. Quick as lighting, she had her hands clasped, her head tilted, and her smile beaming. The terror I might have rightly felt in the presence of these fierce hunters was allayed by Kate's charms. She could gentle the meanest of us.

Tava's Wrath

2009-06-17T22:21:00.000-07:00

Our most recent trip to Discovery Kingdom included my folks, who were due for a day of fun with the grandkids. But all was not well at Discovery Kingdom.

Here we are sitting ring-side in the Tava the Elephant amphitheater. She's begun putting on her show, but we've noticed how much her handler taunts her. Things are getting tense. See how my Mom looks anxious, though the kids are oblivious to the violence about to erupt...

See how the trainer holds the fruit aloft, just out of reach of Tava's grasping trunk? Now, we all know how intelligent and emotionally complicated these beasts are. We also know of their immense strength. Would you taunt an elephant like this, in front of a crowd no less? Well, Tava had had enough.

She scooped him up on her knee and reared back. Look at the terror on his face as he feebly grasps at her tusk in an attempt to survive the retributive attack...

But it's to no avail! The elephant will not be soothed! She grips the handler in her trunk and begins to squeeze. It is horrible! It is pitiful! Oh the workman's comp claims!

But my family came to the rescue. Annie and the grandparents walked up with the kids to assuage the anger of the maddened beast, braving physical harm and even death. Here they are, reaching out to stroke her wrinkly hide to placate her wrath. We saved the handler, though he suffered some broken ribs (comeuppance, I call it). And I was there to capture it all on SD card.

Ben's Bridge

2009-06-17T22:15:00.000-07:00

The push up seems to be the near universal precursor to crawling. At least all of our kids have developed the talent. It's not really a push up -- it's more of a bridge. Ben uses his new-found talent to rock back and forth, preparatory to ambulating about on his hands and knees.

This pose also allows him to minimize his surface area in contact with the ground beneath him. That'll come in handy should he ever be caught on hot asphalt. He's our little gecko.

Ben the Muggle

2009-06-14T22:10:00.000-07:00

One of the main attractions for the girls' birthday party included batting about a pinata. Only scraps were left after they had ravished it. One of those scraps ended up on Ben's head.

We thought it looked a bit like a wizarding hat, but I suspect that Ben is all muggle. Though, he does looked to have charmed his grandma...

Birthday Girls

2009-06-14T21:58:00.000-07:00

We call them our June bugs, our girls, all three of whom were born in the middle of June. For one day Annie and I could say that we had three kids one year and younger, since Julia was born one day before the twins turned two.

Over the years they've come to understand how gratifying it is to us gift givers to see the gift receiver properly ooh and aww and fawn over their gifts (see first three photos). And we, as the parents, have come to understand that with three girls come a whole bunch more, as the scene on the sofa reveals. That last shot, of the girls drawing on the pavement in the backyard, highlights was an ethnically diverse set of friends and family our girls have. Why, some of them have darker hair than some of the others. What a melting pot.

Backyard Shenanigans

2009-06-12T13:34:00.000-07:00

What is it that Genna is so masterfully rolling? Or Kate, with her careful consideration before applying the paint?

How about Julia, with her deft strokes of the brush?

Why is Sammy dressed up for hard labor, with his Spiderman hat on backwards and his pink apron on? Why the broom and smile?

What is it that I'm working on? Why have I so cleverly sunk and leveled six cinder blocks? (Notice how well I've sucked in my gut...just enough to cause people to think, "Well, he's not as chunky as I thought he was," but not so much that you know I'm sucking my gut in).

Why, we're building a playhouse of course! There's Sam once again, having shed his work clothes in favor of his play clothes, though prematurely: we hadn't put the roof on by this point. Nevertheless, I can understand his enthusiasm.

We've warned the kids about playhouses. I told them how I watched a show in my childhood about a certain man and his playhouse, and I've told the girls to let me know if any of their playhouse furniture becomes sentient or even animated. We'll have none of those shenanigans in our yard, thank you very much.

Look Sassy

2009-06-07T13:28:00.000-07:00

I thought of having the girls pose in their new dresses, showing off their pearly whites (though some are missing from Kate's maw) and dimples. But I decided to boldly throw off tradition and have the girls strike a different pose.

I forget now what I said to prompt these expressions. It was probably something like 'look sassy.' But, as I'm now recalling, I think I told them to ponder the plight of the endangered Russian desman. Kate and Genna weren't happy at my suggestion, seeing as they are concerned about our world's biosphere. Julia, however, is happy having one less mole-like creature on the planet. She needs some more teaching.

Summer Movie Night

2009-06-05T13:25:00.000-07:00

Ah, late summer evenings. You're fresh out of the bath, in your jammies, and spread out on a blanket taking in handfuls of popcorn. You've got your siblings beside you, and all is well with the world.

I honestly never knew that the movie Crime and Punishment in its original Russian could be so captivating. Dostoyevsky would be so proud.

Sam's Car Train

2009-06-01T13:16:00.000-07:00

Sam's two great passions in life are trains and cars. So what could be better than a train made out of cars? Nothing, that's what. And so it is that he likes to array his many cars in the semblance of a train.

This would be like me being able to combine my favorite past times of sleeping and eating, maybe with a bed made out of pizza. How about it, Sam?

Ben in the Bath

2009-05-30T13:17:00.000-07:00

Ah, time for Ben's semi-annual bath. It was amazing how dark the water got after all the sludge of six months of lying, rolling, sleeping, and finally sitting sloughed off him. Look how sparkly he got! Look how happy he is (or is that indignant rage?)! Look how he marvels at the washcloth! I just hope we didn't flush his soul down the drain along with the bath water...

2009-05-29T13:10:00.000-07:00

What do you get when you have three girls with birthdays in the same month? You get early birthday parties -- both to ease up the stress on the calendar and to reduce carbon emissions.

With that in mind, Annie coordinated having the three girl cousins over to add to the mayhem of our three daughters. Riotous water games ensued, as did a raucous round of cake baking (which was actually six twinkies cleverly disguised as six girls lying under the covers). And what party would be complete without a slumber? (I have no idea how much slumbering actually occurred -- but it doesn't look like much).

Discovery Kingdom Miscellany

2009-05-26T14:15:00.000-07:00

Just a few more photos from our May run to Discovery Kingdom (they should be paying me).

First you'll see me as an angry green beast with some cloven-hoofed, scantily-clad demons who happen to be my daughters. That's wrong all sorts of ways.

Then you'll see Annie on the carousel, once again incapacitated by her fear of spinning.

Then you have Kate and Genna being angelic in a caboose.

Last, and deservedly least (since my family comes before other mammals), you'll see the girls posed with Jako and then Odin the tiger going after man flesh. Or beef. I can't remember.

Ben Gets His Bounce On

2009-05-08T12:48:00.000-07:00

Shouka Flies

2009-05-06T14:09:00.000-07:00

I cropped this down, but hey, great shot of Shouka at Discovery Kingdom.

War Elephant Preparations

2009-05-04T06:36:00.000-07:00

On a recent trip to Discovery Kingdom we had the good fortune of seeing an elephant being hosed down for her afternoon bath. Julia was thrilled to be so close to the action.

Her sisters soon joined her, and the elephant's trainer, oblivious to our presence, began to outfit the elephant for war. See that howdah on its back? That sucker can hold a half dozen spearmen or archers, not including the mahout with his goad.

Unfortunately, we were spotted immediately after this photo, and I wasn't able to take pictures as the 'trainer' draped armored plates across the elephant's head, chest, and flanks,. Neither was I able to get any footage of the Carthaginian soldiers climbing on to her back.

Sam Being a Booger

2009-05-02T22:07:00.000-07:00

Lookee here! Video! The unveiling of Lindsay Films. This one stars a toddler named Sam. Strange that a 20-month-old should be so unwilling to comply.

Sammy Won't Say It from Justin Lindsay on Vimeo.

Not Camera Shy

2009-04-29T08:27:00.000-07:00

The holidays make for picture time. The twins make for picture time. Missing teeth make for picture time. So, this Easter was a triple threat.

Kate sees a camera, and she poses. The stripes of early Easter Sunday sunlight were just a bonus.

Kate also lost a tooth on Easter, so she had even more cause to smile. Genna wouldn't be left out of it (she is still bitter over having not lost any teeth), so she had to show off her dental wares as well.

Of Wands and Magic Circles

2009-04-05T08:22:00.000-07:00

Genna is arranging a magic circle here, with the stuffed animals forming the boundary of the circle, and the man-child forming the object of the circle. But seeing as the man-child has the wand, I think Genna's doing it wrong.

I'll have to consult our Grimoire to see what actually needs to happen.

Sam vs. Food

2009-03-30T11:47:00.000-07:00

What do you get when you put bowls of food in front of Sam? Usually, you get a kid whose hypoglycemic anger quickly turns to happiness as sugar hits his blood stream. But every so often, and this seems to happen more with foods that stain, you'll end up with Sam wearing the contents of the bowl.

The first two shots are of Sam contending with a serving of spaghetti. At first glance, you'd think the spaghetti won. Such is not the case, however, as shown by Sam's irreverent jamming of his finger up his nose and donning of the bowl as a hat.

The last two shots are of what's left of a bowl of chili. Sam liked the chili, so it didn't end up on his head. Instead, we get a glimpse of what he will look like when he's old enough to sport a goatee.

Ben's Burden

2009-03-24T13:10:00.000-07:00

One burden Ben bears is the utter adoration of his sisters. This will prove to be a strength to him in time, but until then, he won't understand the concept of personal space for years, because he won't have any.

Letting Sleeping Bens Lie

2009-03-17T05:20:00.000-07:00

Little Ben sleeping. He speaks for himself.

More Lichen and Barnacles

2009-03-14T05:44:00.000-07:00

I've shown how this happens before: if you leave anything alone for too long in our house, it begins to sprout ornaments, like lichen on a weather-beaten chunk of rock, or barnacles on the hull of a ship.

Such was the case with this cabinet we had in our family room for but a couple of days. We decided we didn't want it there, so I went to move it back to the garage. But before doing so, I peeked inside. Sure enough, the girls had made a little display of necklaces and bracelets inside. Though, it does look quite a bit like a shrine...

This is perhaps the most extreme example. Ben remained too still for too long. We came in to find that the girls had draped some shear, blue cloth over the structure of his play mat, and had even piled stuff animals on his chest (you can see a turtle in there). Ben, for his part, didn't seem to mind.

Sam's Dilemma

2009-03-10T20:52:00.000-07:00

Sam has a dilemma, what with having three older sisters. We and the family have supplied him with plenty of your traditional toys for boys, but that doesn't mean that he isn't allowed to partake of his sisters'. Such is the case as seen below, where he can choose between his cars or his sisters' tea party cart. He doesn't know it's a dilemma, really, so maybe it's my dilemma.

In the end, he usually chooses the cars. And when he uses the cart, it's usually employed as a ramming device. Though, none of that speaks to his love of pink flip flops and headbands.

Chasing Ducks

2009-03-05T07:00:00.000-08:00

Little Sammy, like his sisters, is an animal lover. Little Sammy, unlike his sisters, has no fear of animals. Dogs, cats, tortoises, no matter the beast or the size, the animal will get more than its fair share of Sammy if we let him have too much rein. Such was the case when we recently took the family to the UCD arboretum to feed the ducks.

Sammy ventured far and wide in his quest to corner a duck. He chased this poor hen up a hill...

...and then right back down. It turns out that ducks have a knack for avoiding toddlers moving at 1 mph without evening having to take to the wing. Unfortunately, not simply flying away encouraged Sam to continue the chase, long after said chase had become a variant on the wild goose theme.

The lady duck eventually made good her escape, so Sam turned his attention to two mallards, much to the ducks' dismay. He chased them across the field...

...and then chased another pair of ducks back across the field.

Sam's quest for ducks only reached an end when he had chased the last of them into the water. He was philosophical about it, just standing there for a moment to watch his prey escape onto the murky-green surface of the duck pond. He then ambled his way back to mommy, who was seated at a nearby bench.

As he turned away, though, I second guessed myself. Maybe it wasn't his intention at all to catch one. Maybe he was instead something of a duck herder, and he didn't see his task complete until all of his charges had been driven to the safety of the water.

Well done, little duck herder.

An Evening with the Tillmans

2009-02-28T06:56:00.000-08:00

Evenings with the Tillmans are always entertaining. How could they not be, with the presence of Max and Maggie inspiring our children to new heights (literally) of poor judgment?

Here is Julia, showing off her climbing skills to the Max, who looks to be regarding the base of the railing for some means of undermining its structural integrity...

Am I sending a mixed message by telling Julia to stay put while I take a picture, then by reprimanding her for climbing something she shouldn't? Does it matter at all, since she is a monkey who will climb anything she can get her hands and feet on?

Clutching Horsey

2009-02-25T06:45:00.000-08:00

We always check in on the girls before we go to bed. Most nights we see Kate like this, in a classic (almost staged) sleeping pose, with Horsey clutched to her. Horsey may be ragged and even sporting a deep, stuffing-revealing rip along her neck (where her jugular would be), but Kate doesn't seem to mind.

Neither does Horsey.

Is He Davey Crockett Junior

2009-02-20T06:39:00.000-08:00

...or is he one of the Mario Brothers having recently caught himself a raccoon tail?

Perhaps this question is answered by the fact that immediately following these photos, he leaped in the air, bounced on his auntie's head and proceeded racing around and lashing his siblings with his tail, all the while collecting coins.

Of course, the last we saw of Ben, he was on his way to Texas, supposedly doing his 'patriotic duty'...

The Hand Writing on the Piano

2009-02-15T06:34:00.000-08:00

This is why we try to dust more often. There are fewer greater slights your child can offer you than to use your own lapse in cleanliness to entertain themselves. But Genna could have chosen worst things than her name to write, and I'm proud of her for not turning to the default of 'wash me.'

This reminds me of a time in my youth when I was caught having written in my neighbors freshly-poured cement. I tried to deny it, but my guilt was soon proven for my vandalism had consisted of writing my actual name in the cement.

Morning Light on Julia

2009-02-10T13:09:00.000-08:00

Here is one of my mostest favoritest photos of Julia. Nothing terribly special was going at the time. It was sometime after breakfast, and Julia and I were at the table. I noticed how the morning light was filtering through the window, and I liked how it shone on Julia's face. So I busted out the camera and captured it. Thus is a perfect picture born.

Brothers

2009-02-05T13:06:00.000-08:00

Sam and Ben continue to bond, though Sam seems to be doing most of the effort. Ben just lays there (getting tummy-time here), while Sam presents his mouth for a kiss. Ben never reciprocates, save with his customary smile, and Sam seems content with that. We're all content with that. Ben could charm Al'Qaeda agents into talking, and liking it, too.

Pin Face

2009-01-23T07:01:00.000-08:00

I recently rediscovered this toy from my childhood. For the life of me, I can't remember what it's called, but we've all played with them. Anyways...the kids have had a blast playing with...it.

Here we have Genna's smiling face embedded into the pins, and the real life smile on her actual face beside it. Uncanny likeness. We also have Sam in the background, who looks like he has sprouted off of Genna's shoulder, like one of Zeus's progeny.

Sam seemed interested enough in the toy that I pressed it onto his face. He was so surprised that he didn't react for a moment. His indecision can be seen in the pins. By the time I took this photo, he was able to recover from the shock and glower.

Three Little Girls Drawing

2009-01-20T12:33:00.000-08:00

Our girls love drawing. We supply them with all sorts of paper and markers and pencils and crayons, and they go to town. Seriously, they can burn through hours of daylight with their artistic endeavors.

Julia's skills have increased by leaps and bounds over the past month. Here is a sketch she did on one of our coveted Magna-Doodles. She's getting good, isn't she? I'm not sure who this girl is supposed to be, but she's got a pleasant smile. That bodes well, if I'm to read anything into it regarding Julia's psyche.

Kate's drawings nearly always abound with princesses and castles, or depictions of the family. Lately she has made some forays into new territories. Here we have a snap shot from her recent excursion into Monsterland. I'm thinking it's a goblin of some sort. She did well with the pointy ears, sharp fangs, and asymmetrical eyes. I, for one, would not like to meet this creature in a dark alley.

Genna tends to spurn the Magna-Doodle in favor of the more traditional medium of pencil on paper. This one is a bit faint, but you should be able to pick out what it is. It's just what Dr. Morea dreamed of--a human-animal hybrid. I don't think Genna has ever seen a centaur or any creature like it, so I'm not sure what triggered this drawing. But it's a female centaur, complete with flowing locks of blue hair and blue eyelashes. Maybe there's something to the Jungian Collective Unconscious, or Plato's forms...

Ben's Belly Time

2009-01-16T07:06:00.000-08:00

Little Ben, showing off his belly skills. Look at how well he can hold his head up! He can even manage a smile. That's multi-tasking people. He is a talented young man. I see a bright future for him. Especially with my constant goading, setting of unreachable goals, and helicopter-like parenting techniques.

Of Algae, Barnacles, and Toys

2009-01-14T10:18:00.000-08:00

We've found that if we leave any flat surface unattended and within reach of the girls, it will soon sprout toys, tea sets, Polly Pocket scenes, and mini bedrooms.

I was busy installing a ceiling fan in the spare bedroom and left my workbench alone for only 20 minutes. But that was long enough for me to find this (note the chair in the background, too)...

If you leave standing water in the sun, you'll soon have algae. Leave your boat floating in the water, and you'll have barnacles. Leave me alone with an extra-large pizza, and I'll soon gain a couple of pounds. Such is the case with our living room table, sofa, and love seat; they start growing their own little ecosystems. Kate is usually the culprit, though her sisters are both aiders and abettors (Sam tends to undo their work).

Below is a scene I came across a couple of nights ago after I tucked the girls in. The love seat became a bed with a baby teddy bear (I say baby, because he has a diaper rag beneath him, just like Ben whenever we lay him down on furniture), and the table is an impromptu market and kitchen. Add a toilet, and you pretty much have a fully functioning domicile/place of business.

Diaper Loading

2009-01-12T09:31:00.000-08:00

The Brothers

2009-01-10T13:07:00.000-08:00

We've been very pleased at how well Sam has taken to Ben. Though he's been found guilty of a few eye pokings and stabs at Ben's head with Hot Wheels, we don't think he's had any malicious intentions. Yet. So far, it's been nothing but love and fascination. And we'll enjoy it while it lasts.

Ah, the time honored fraternal sharing of pacifiers, including the transmission all the koodies boys are able to harbor.

Here they are looking toward mommy. Sam is dismissing her with a goodbye wave, and Ben is looking for aid.

But Sam meant no harm. Here he is presenting his head for snuggling--Sam's version of a hug. Ben is still looking for assistance.

Of Huge Kisses and Blossoms

2009-01-08T12:59:00.000-08:00

Annie has done quite a bit of baking lately. In particular, she has taking to modifying known cookies recipes. So far, each one has turned out very well (as attested to by my recent forays onto the scale).

Here is one of her concoctions. She took your standard peanut butter blossom, as seen on the left, and magnified it several times over, using an uber-kiss I had bought her for Christmas. She ended up with a mega peanut butter blossom that had to be eaten more like a cake than a cookie. No one minded. (For all you Pampered Chef fans, please note the well-seasoned stoneware bar pans).

What I Missed in 2008 - Part 3 (Final)

2009-01-06T07:05:00.000-08:00

The biggest event that happened in our lives was the arrival of Ben. I was with-it enough to document his arrival blog-wise, but I didn't do much of the actual pregnancy portion, which took up most of '08.

Annie and I see our photos as assets, to be used at a later day. Here we staged a guilt photo that we can pull out when Ben gets older. "Look at your mother! Here she is, driven to her knees while her womb is wracked with a contraction! And you want to sass her? How can you treat her like this?! HOW DARE YOU!" It's going to be beautiful.

Here I am performing my husbandly duty by holding up her burgeoning belly (she's just a couple weeks away from delivering Ben at this point). Further proof that I am a fantastic husband, father, and man.

I finally let Annie take a break from the photo shoot, and she retired to the shade and the comfort of the wicker chair. I thought the hibiscus here made for a nice compliment to her shirt. I'm also a fantastic photographer.

Actually, here's proof that I still have a lot to learn about photography. One of the maxims of taking a good photo is to pay attention to the background. For instance, when taking a sweet picture of your pregnant wife at the pumpkin patch, try to make sure that a red-headed child isn't trying to climb inside her head.

I still didn't catch onto the fact that children were climbing inside Annie's skull and kept on taking photos. You can see her expression begin to sour as another group of boys join the red head for a romp inside Annie's brain pan. So much to learn, little photographer.

There was one more addition to the clan that I need to mention. And here he is: Jack the Russian Desert Tortoise (just 'Jack' for short). He's been with us for only a few weeks longer than Ben. Jack is four years old, eats spring mix and dandelions, enjoys basking in the sun, and doesn't require diaper changes or being house broken. His shell and scales make him resilient to damage. He isn't capable of misbehaving, and he requires little interaction with his human overlords. We're trying to teach the children to be more like Jack.

What I Missed in 2008 - Part 2

2009-01-04T06:58:00.000-08:00

I missed blogging on some of the little things. You know, things parents don't usually think to pay attention to. Things like your children's first day at school. I was there for it. I took time off work to see them off and take pictures. I just didn't share it. Once again, naughty blogger.

Kate and Genna were eager to be off, and here they are, hand-in-hand, wearing backpacks big enough to hold both their school work and their jet packs (which, we later found out, are prohibited on public campuses).

While staying with the Walkers, the girls (well, mainly Bob) planted sunflowers and watched them grow throughout the summer. I've heard that in ancient times, ninja would train by leaping over growing plants, so that every day their training would get harder as the plants grew. I tried doing this with my girls, but that only resulted in them almost getting impaled on those dangerous tomato frames.

(Please note the subtle Disney plug--Genna wearing a coveted Pocahontas dress)

Sam enjoyed his one year birthday at my folk's place. Here's the obligatory covered-in-cake shot. Though, frankly, I've seen worse. Much worse. I expect more of you, son!

But Sam made up for it by being bad elsewhere. And what's better, I didn't have to be there for it. Here's mama Jeanne restraining Sam while he got his first official haircut. It was a grueling ordeal, something akin to water boarding. Sam finally admitted to being Al Qaeda and even gave up the whereabouts of Osama's hidey hole. And he ended up with a slick haircut. (we'll be doing simple buzzes from here on).

I think Jeanne was happy to be part of Sam's torture because he had been such a nuisance around the house. It was her time to give Sam his comuppance. Here's one such instance of there almost daily conflicts. Sam has always been fascinated by dishwashers. They are usually full of shiny pokey things, the adults are always filling it, and they're low enough for him to climb on. Here's Jeanne faced with the prospect of having the bull break her fancy dishwasher. See the horror and rage on her face?

What I Missed in 2008 - Part 1

2009-01-02T07:05:00.000-08:00

I was a naughty blogger in 2008. I was so negligent, that I missed a lot that I could have passed on. I'm now sifting through my oodles of photos from 2008 like a miner panning for gold, to bring you the nuggets that otherwise might have never seen the light of day...

...anyways...

This is one of Annie's favorite pictures of Sam. He's curled up on my folk's sofa on Easter Day and smiling at his mother like only an eight-month-old can.

Here are the girls all lined up during a birthday party. I have no idea whose birthday party it was, and I don't think it matters. I don't think they even knew. There are just so many girls running around that all the squealing and screaming and playing rolls into one big Squeal Fest. And of course, Julia has stripped down to something less than proper. We need to break her of that over the next few years.

While at Discovery Kingdom the kids were able to find a docile crocodile and climb aboard long enough for me to take this shot. Would you look at that. Everyone of them is smiling (Julia with her uber-smile). Sam isn't fighting it. It's a Discovery Kingdom miracle.

Here's Julia goofing off while we wait for the twins' swim lessons to start. She's easily entertained and quite entertaining. She's good to have on hand while you're waiting in line or sitting in traffic--you'll never get bored.

Annie wanted a nice photo taken of her and Julia in the pool (I think for Sam's birthday--but again, does it matter?). Karri had other plans. Click on the photo for a close up. Karri, how did you manage to give us a glimpse of that dangly thing at the back of your mouth? Thanks for the photobomb.

Christmas 2008

2008-12-27T21:49:00.000-08:00

Christmas was a lot of fun this year. With the kids growing up, we got to explain more of what the season means (with some help from the Grinch). Here's our second annual living nativity. This year the role of Joseph went to Kurtis. Mary was played by Genna. The three kings (wise men) were played by Julia (not much of a wise man), Carter, and Casey (who stabbed everyone repeatedly with his new fake switchblade--very much in the Christmas spirit).

You'll notice the angels played by Molly and Maggie. Kate and Sophie were the shepherds, and they had their hands pressed together in prayer the entire time. They never broke character. That's dedication. The Baby Jesus was of course played by the most recent newborn, Ben. Sam declined playing any part of the nativity. Evidently the scriptures didn't have any non-compliant, disruptive toddlers anywhere in the narrative.

We also made our annual trip to the Oakland Temple to see the Christmas lights. I brought my trusty camera and trusty tripod and had fun running around the grounds while neglecting my family and leaving all the parenting to Annie and the grandparents.

The new manger scene:

The grounds from just inside the gates. They changed the lights up from last year. I liked the new look quite a bit.

Sam, Monthly

2008-12-24T13:13:00.000-08:00

Annie has been diligent in having portraits taken of each of the kids for each of their first twelve months of life. We recently scanned all of Sam's portraits, and it would be wrong of me not to share. Enjoy.

Sam at One Month. Asleep, be-overalled, and curled up as only babies can be. He also has the most hair he'll have for several months. Where did it go? The hair fairy took it.

Sam at Two Months. Still asleep and still unable to lift his one-hundredth percentile head off the ground.

Sam at Three Months. Finally able to lift his head and smile. Or strain, not sure which one it is. Back in the overalls and now overtly adoring his mother.

Sam at Four Months. Almost sitting up. He's mastering the squinty-eyed smile for which he has become famous. The moose is also very appropriate. He's turning into one. And again, notice that perfectly symmetrical head.

Sam at Five Months. Back on his belly, but showing off his neck muscle strength and coordination. Winter is here, and he is properly dressed for it.

Sam at Sixth Months. Now he's just showing off. He's grown hair once again (it took a liberal dose of Chia Head to get a good crop growing). And look at him on the verge of crawling.

Sam at Seven Months. With Winter on its way out, Sammy turns to the islands for his fashion sense. He's sitting up and displaying his ~~weapon~~ block collection.

Sam at Eight Months. He's going for a Eur0-minimalist look that will only work for as long as he's in diapers. Thereafter, my boy, you'll have to wear some pants (I know, I, too, loathe having to wear pants). Check out that tuft of hair that Annie managed to style!

Sam at Nine Months. He has so much hair now that a mohawk is in order. Actually, it's more of a faux-hawk, a la his Uncle Brian. His patented blue eyes are developing that impish look that we've come to expect of him.

Sam at Ten Months. That's the smile we know! That's the flaxen fuzz we know! That's the ball my forehead will soon know!

Sam at Eleven Months. Sam's becoming a little man. He's back with the island theme, sporting board shorts and looking like he should be in a department store ad. I'd buy those shorts for a cool $19.99.

Sam at One Year. Ah, full circle (orbitally speaking at least). My how they grow. He's standing, though not walking. And he's menacing any furniture he can get his hands on.

Caught in the Candy Dish

2008-12-21T07:10:00.000-08:00

What? What's this? What parent in their right mind would leave a candy dish within easy reach of a toddler who has just recently learned how to toddle? Not us. At least, not within easy reach. But we knew this day would come--the day when the ceramic snowman would give up his M&M offerings to unauthorized personnel.

If humans are tool-using monkeys, then Sam is no exception. In fact, he has learned how to put his car to multiple uses. Not only does his car provide transportation (if limited, and foot-powered), but it can also be used as a ramming device, and now as a mobile step stool.

Needless to say, the candy dish got moved. (to a place where mommy and daddy have even more ready access, much to our waistlines' and thighs' delight--both were looking for greater mass and surface area)

Beneath the Christmas Tree

2008-12-19T11:58:00.000-08:00

It's moments like the one captured below that make parenting worthwhile. Moments where you suddenly realize that your kids have been paying attention, and that your kids are even cooler than you thought they were (and you were already being generous with that opinion).

The particular child in question here is Kate. She had gone quiet for a good hour in the living room. Only when bed time approached did she come back up for air. We asked her what she had been doing, and she led us to this scene beneath the Christmas tree.

Take a moment to soak it in. Can you see what she did? Click on the picture if you want a blown-up view.

That's right. She made her own nativity scene, with toys and implements that she had on hand. And consider how thorough she was. At the heart of the display she has the baby Jesus lying on a Polly Pocket murphy bed, with Joseph and Mary sitting on either side. I don't know what brand of toys these are, but they're reminiscent of Legos.

Next we have the role of the Wise Men being played by two Cinderellas, Belle (a second Belle can be found to the right of the scene), Ariel, and Sleeping Beauty. This might be a bit revisionist on Kate's part (she's a burgeoning feminist), but she doesn't have many male figurines to work with. Prince Philip has been missing for months, and Prince Charming got thrown away when his legs broke off.

Then there's the livestock. Though traditionally an ox and a donkey is used, Kate used two varieties of pony.

But there's more. The role of the herald angel is played by Barbie Mariposa (with butterfly wings). If this were analyzed in terms of hierarchy of scale, the angel would rein supreme.

What's not shown in the photo is that Kate rearranged some of the tree ornaments so that a star hung just above the Polly Pocket 'manger.'

And all of it beneath a Christmas tree!

Yup. I think we'll keep doing this parenting thing.

Holding Ben

2008-12-17T07:04:00.000-08:00

Annie has enlisted the aid of the twins so that she doesn't have to feed Ben so often (an onerous task, as anyone can attest to). When one of her soap operas comes on, or she's preparing for her daily nap, or she wants to go to the mall for some 'mommy time', she warms up a bottle, picks up hungry Ben, and commandeers a twin.

Thankfully, they're good sports about it. They even seem to enjoy it. Here's Kate, equipped with diaper rag, bottle, and a boppy pillow. And a smile. There's a trooper.

I'm not sure what Genna's smile here is all about. But it can't be good. Not for Ben. Not for the family. Not for humanity. But we're just glad that she's finally earning her keep.

On a side note, Ben has learned how to fly. He's done so earlier than expected. Julia was our earliest flyer, but since we've been told that boys are slower in developing, we thought we had another month or so before he became airborne. Not so. Luckily I was there on his first flight. I was able to seize him as he passed by the kitchen table before he came down for a landing. The first landings are always so painful.

Here Comes Santa Claus

2008-12-15T06:47:00.000-08:00

Santa Claus had numerous pre-Christmas engagements, and we were there for two of them. How in the world does he squeeze in all these appearances and still keep the elves productive? It's yet another Christmas miracle.

The girls awaited their turn on Santa's lap with eager anticipation. They came dressed in their own Christmas garb and wore their favorite matching silver head bands. If Genna looks unenthused, she's just playing it cool, so as not to seem over eager. She's psyching out the big man.

Poor Sam didn't know what awaited him as Annie plucked him from his stroller and brought him up on stage. But once he saw his destination, he fought. And hard. Santa took it all with a smile, though I think he has tagged Sam for his naughty list. In my opinion, a little dose of stranger anxiety is probably a good thing. And you know how kids can sense evil...

We didn't make Sam wait long. Just long enough for me to capture his horror on camera.

And for the coup-de-grace. Is there anything more precious than an angelic little baby being held by Santa (there is, but let's not be technical)? Even Santa seemed caught up in the moment. Ben, as usual, was oblivious.

As a side note, in every one of these photos I had to filter out the kids' red eyes. But never once did Santa have red eye. This is further proof that Santa isn't a mere human. His retinas are different, which must allow him to see better at night. Nocturnal vision would be a must in his line of work.

At the Christmas Tree Farm

2008-11-29T12:47:00.000-08:00

The day after Thanksgiving is the day we devote to preparing for Christmas. This entails wading through the flotsam that is our garage storage to find the bins that contain the decorations that will soon festoon our house. But that's just my task.

The kids get to enjoy a trip to the Christmas tree lot, where we search for this year's victim. Here are photos I took of our visit to Silveyville Christmas Tree Farm. Here's a plug for the place: it's lots of fun. They've got a nice nativity scene, a sleigh ride with Santa Claus, plenty of help, free hot cider and popcorn. Good stuff.

Now, on to the photos.

Kate's always ready with a pose. She can drop whatever she's doing, no matter how important or menial, and strike one. She never fails. And I love it. Makes my job as photographer so much easier.

Genna poses with little prompting as well. She usually prefers some sort of prop, though. The autumn landscape of the Christmas tree farm offered little in the way of flowers, but Genna was perfectly happy posing with a bedraggled sprig of dandelion.

As our resident three-year-old, Julia requires a bit of finesse to catch properly on camera. She likes having photos taken of her, but she just can't sit still for long. But this didn't daunt me. I used it to my advantage and was able to get a picture which, unlike most other photos, sums up the subject in a single wink of the shutter.

Sam didn't get much room to roam, what with Santa riding around in his diesel sleigh and terrorizing the guests. But he was content with his bear ears and stick. He even managed not to hurt himself.

Ben was oblivious to the occasion, which was fine with us. He radiated cuteness from the double stroller (safe from Sam's reach) while we debated which tree to get. Oh, sweet oblivion.

The Boys

2008-11-15T09:02:00.000-08:00

Yikes the boys are growing up. We're administering growth-stunting hormones to them, but that doesn't seem to be helping at all.

Sam can't get enough of his car and has even managed to break it. I expect nothing less of him. In fact, I would be disappointed if he hadn't. But now I need to go out and find a new caster to repair it. I'll take that expense out of his future earnings.

Ben's head, unlike that of his brother, is in a normal range in terms of circumference (not in terms of raw processing power, which is off the charts). That means that he is able to hold it up for an appreciable length of time. He was able to hold it up during the entire length of his bath, despite the prodding and scrubbing his mother administered to him.

But he wouldn't look at the camera, try as I might to pry his eyes off of the fascinating wall beside him. Hopefully the girls will start teaching him some tips for how to pose, and like it.

At the Patch

2008-10-29T06:07:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since my last post, so I thought I'd try to get caught up. Hence the disparity between subject matter to release date.

Here's our annual visit to Bobby Dazzler's Pumpkin patch. The first thing the girls do upon arrival is scramble to the top of the hay bail pile, like mountaineers searching for the peak of K2, and perch beside the pumpkin sign. I, like an intrepid documentarian, was there to capture it all on SD card.

Next we loaded them into a John Deere wagon and hauled them around the patch. You'll notice that Ben isn't present. That's because he's still in utero at this point. That's how far behind I am in my posts. So, Ben is there. He's just enjoying a nice warm float in amniotic fluid as opposed to jouncing around in a wagon full of his large and dangerous siblings.

This next one is the obligatory family photo, much to the pumpkins' dismay (though I admire their structural integrity: over-fed me and pregnant Annie can strain the load capacities of almost any squash). Please note that Annie got all the kids to don their Halloween garb. This shot is but one of many, for the innocent bystander that we waylaid to take this photo had to contend with a Sam who wasn't amenable to taking photos. Not with so many pumpkin victims awaiting him.

No sooner had Sam laid into the pumpkins than the pumpkins had their revenge. Sam didn't realize that it's hard for a 14-month-old to balance atop a round, smooth surface for very long. After a brief cry, he picked himself up off the hay-strewn ground, ready for more.

Once safely back in the wagon, Sam had his revenge. Every pumpkin we placed in the wagon with him was inspected and summarily ejected. He's tough on produce, especially the seasonal stuff. Note the shirt: I Love My Mummy.

Baby Ben

2008-10-28T19:17:00.000-07:00

At long last...the much-anticipated photo spread of the newest addition to the Lindsay Clan. Please welcome Benjamin Walker Lindsay.

Little Ben was thrown (almost literally--the midwife had to catch him without gloves on--Annie got him out in one push) into this world at 11:33 on 10/22. That's four days after his due date--a fact his mother will drill into him every time he misbehaves. He weighed in at 7lbs 12oz, and 20" in length.

Here he is getting the birth goop washed off him by the not-too-gentle-but-still-kind hands of the L&D staff. He made plaintiff little mewlings throughout the sudsy ordeal. I think the sounds were meant to be cries, but they were way too endearing.

Once his body was degooped, the nurse wrapped him up in a towel and rinsed his head off. He had settled down by this time and seemed unimpressed by her ministrations. The youth these days are desensitized and jaded so quickly.

Here he is only a couple of days later. He had already been introduced to his sisters and brother (Sam didn't know what to make of the newcomer. And he hasn't figured it out yet). You can see that he has a healthy shock of hair, dark eyes, and a blinkless stare that could soften even the most hardened criminal. Those are my feminine and matronly hands holding him...oh, wait. Those aren't my hands. They're Annie's aunt's hands. Nevermind.

Unlike his pale, nearly-bald, blond, and blue-eyed brother, Ben is hairy, olive-skinned, and endowed with a normal-sized head (gets that from his mother's side). He has sideburns and elfin ears, which has earned him the nickname of Wolfman. Here he is reposed in the classic angelic pose of all werewolves during the new moon.

Here he is today, doing what he does best: napping and looking good while he does it. After about six days of extra-uterine life, he seems to be a good-natured lad with a healthy appetite and a propensity for filling his diaper. He doesn't cry without good cause, sleeps well at night, and has yet to sass back or earn the wrath of his siblings. We're thinking that we'll keep him.

Yet More DB

2008-09-01T22:04:00.000-07:00

Just a few more Dillon Beach photos.

Here's what you get when give all the girls apples and have them line up on a bench. Well, uh, you get a row of six girls eating apples on a bench.

Ah, sisters and cousins. So nice. I'm posting this not only to show how nice they get along, but also to showcase Julia's shmarmy smile. I see her selling used Buicks or hosting a game show when she grows up.

Sam is living proof that man is a tool using animal. Sure, he may have no idea what a sand rake is for, but he enjoys holding it. He is also living proof that man is a weapon using animal. The tool was quickly turned to violence, though it was the sand and his own head that bore the brunt of his aggression.

More DB

2008-08-31T21:17:00.000-07:00

I need to get caught up on my posts, and I wanted to continue with my Dillon Beach Spread.

So here goes.

This is Sam's first encounter with sand, which is always a big first in any child's life. He was pleased, but evidently not too hungry, because not too much ended up in his mouth. Sad to say, that hat wasn't long for his head. It soon came to be shade for a grateful patch of sand.

I'm not sure how to explain this next photo. Brian got his hands on a Fox hat and started flashing gang signs. His fingers are twisted into some distorted mockery of a W for West Side, and the Vulcan sign for peace. When I pointed this out to him, he pulled a 9mm on me, shot me in the shoulder, and took my wallet. He's a lot more hard core than I thought. Christine thought the whole thing was cute. Ah, gangsta love.

This next one was too sweet. I actually got a small cavity just from seeing it. Genna's in pink, Julia's in blue. The ocean's also in blue. Mornings at the beach house can be idyllic (once the shrieking has abated).

Sam soon turned to eating sand, as all red-blooded children must. In fact, he was so enamored with the sand that when we plucked him from its gritty surface, he grimaced and flopped to express his displeasure. But that only made his hat become skewed at a jaunty angle, so the camera was once again summoned to duty.

We didn't take the kids to the park for the late night Petaluma fireworks. It's not a lack of patriotic zeal that kept us away: we just didn't feel like dealing with four youngins late at night in huge crowds. But we did celebrate, if a bit less...climactic. We gave the kids their own set of glowsticks, brought them into the walk-in pantry, and turned off the lights. It turned into a photo op for me. And guess what? I think they were just as happy with the glowsticks and a decent bedtime as they would have been with fireworks and grumpiness.

Twins at the Beach

2008-08-26T05:54:00.000-07:00

Yowsers, it's been a while since my last post. So, I thought I'd make it up to you with some quality photos of the twins. These shots were taken during our annual trip to Dillon Beach.

Genna and Kate began kindergarten a couple of weeks ago. They're growing up so quick. Anybody have any means of stunting a kid's growth?

Follow Up Cheez-It Post

2008-07-24T06:53:00.000-07:00

And now, the much anticipated follow up to the uber-Cheez-It post.

Carter was very proud of his Cheez-It
So proud, he wanted to eat it

I was going to start a poem there, but I'm not clever enough.

Anyway, here he is taking his first bite. Look at the glee on his face. Such joy! And can you blame him? This is a five-banger Cheez-It, people! Who wouldn't be happy? Such an honor...

But by the time he has made it through half of the cracker log, something isn't sitting quite right. The glee melts off his face as he considers what might be wrong.

Oh no! His stomach is rejecting the cracker! Is it too much cheese? Too much joy? Has the cracker seen too much of the world, and won't stand for being eaten now? Who knows? But look at the agony on Carter's face! Have you ever seen such pain, such an urgent need to empty one's stomach?

Poor Carter spins to the nearest potted tree (poor Ficus tree) and is forced to his knees as the Cheez-It tries to come back up.

And I was there to capture it all on film (wel, SD card).

The Amazing Cheez-It

2008-07-19T14:37:00.000-07:00

Cheez-Its are one of my favorite crackers. I can eat them all day long. Every so often I find two that are stuck together. Once or twice I think I've found 3 that didn't get caught by quality control and remained fused.

But how many of you can claim, like my nephew Carter, to have found five, count them FIVE, crackers stuck together in a plank of cheesy goodness. None of you, that's how many. Carter was so pleased with his discovery that he sent it along to me so that I might post on its splendor. I was in awe when I first saw it, and I determined that it deserved a whirlwind tour of the house.

Come, follow the Cheez-It.

First we have it in the oven, alone on the rack in a position of honor. Of course, this is a manufactured scene -- like any of us are capable of crafting such a delicious snack ourselves.

And here we have Carter himself, the proud discoverer of the phenomenon. He's like Christopher Columbus, or Benjamin Franklin, or Thomas Edison. Three little diminutive princesses came out to present the snack. How nice of them.

Cinderella is a jealous princess and wanted some time alone with the Cheez-It. I found her in the corner, standing by a blown-glass flower, gazing lovingly at the cracker that is nearly as tall as she is. I took it away and gave Cinderella a time out for not sharing.

Next, I presented the Cheez-It to Auntie Kelli and Auntie Karri. If the tabletop looks a bit like a shrine, what with the candles and the pride of place by the front door, that's because it is a shrine. And the Cheez-It is a worthy offering. Bye bye, twins.

Next, I took the Cheez-It outside to get some sun. Here it is soaking up the rays.

But when the turtle started showing interest in it, it was time to take it back inside. Naughty turtle.

Julia got her hands on it next. Or rather, her head. I thought she had outgrown wearing her food. But I was wrong.

I tried to draw the Cheez-It with a Magna-Doodle. But my drawing didn't look nearly as delicious.

I left the Cheez-It for just a moment, and wouldn't you know it. Cinderella stole it again. She was even trying to flee with it inside her carriage. This time, after I took the cracker away, I took Cinderella's head off and fed it to Sam. That'll show Cinderella.

But Cinderella eventually apologized and decided to share. Here she is, along with Snow White and Sleeping Beauty. Such a lovely group. I'm sure Carter would be very proud.

And last but not least, here's a picture of a metallic ballerina holding the Cheez-It as she dances. Such a beautiful, precious moment.

Sam in Things

2008-07-12T07:01:00.000-07:00

Sam in a clothes hamper = happy Sam

Sam in a swing = contemplative Sam

Tiger Shots

2008-07-10T05:47:00.000-07:00

I close my round of Discovery Kingdom photos with these. They're of one of the resident tigers diving into the water after a chunk of meat.

Julia

2008-07-08T05:42:00.000-07:00

I took this picture at Discovery Kingdom, and it is one of my favorite of Julia. It capture both the impish and the sweet sides of her.

Flying Helicopters

2008-06-30T06:54:00.000-07:00

The girls and I had never flown helicopters before, so we all enjoyed our first time (we were quite reckless, with our hands off the controls). Click on the first image and look at Julia in the second aircraft. Her face is aglow with the joy that only a pilot can know.

The Ladies on an Elephant

2008-06-25T06:49:00.000-07:00

Some more shots from Discovery Kingdom.

Annie and the girls got to ride one of the elephants. I stood at the sidelines with Sam (who is a bigoted elephantophobe) and took photos.

I can tell you this much: you never realize how big an elephant is until you see your family on top of one. Conversely, I'm sure the elephant went back to his buddies at the end of his shift and said, "You never realize how puny humans are until you've got a family of them on your back."

You'll note everyone's glee (save for the elephant and his goad-wielding handler). I was thrilled too: this is the closest my family has ever come (yet) to reenacting Hannibal's invasion of the Roman Empire.

The Kids Encounter a Walrus

2008-06-13T06:29:00.000-07:00

We went to Discovery Kingdom (Marine World Africa USA for you old-timers) a few weeks ago, and the kidlets had a blast. The adventure began with a visit to the walrus exhibit on the way to the Sea Lion Show.

The resident male walrus was fascinated with the kids. He watched them through the glass, clapping his flippers together all the while.

The girls, for their part, were quite enamored with the massive pinniped. I imagine their fondness for the walrus would have turned to something else without the 4-inch-thick plexiglass separating them.

The walrus discovered Sam, and spent a few moments staring him down. Sam didn't quite know what to make of the beast before him, and the encounter soon degenerated into an uneasy Sam turning to mommy for solace and a disinterested walrus turning back to the girls.

Can any of you guess what the walrus was named? We didn't have to consult the display; the girls knew right away. That's right, you guessed it. The walrus is named Wally.

Earthquake in China

2008-05-12T16:02:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about the several Chinese students that have stayed with us as news rolls out of Sichuan province about the devastation and deaths following the 7.9 earthquake earlier today.

Kevin, who stayed with us for several weeks, took the time to email me. Here's what he had to say:

I can hardly bileve that I'm still alive. the earthquake is too terrible
when we rush out,the whole bliuding is shocking,when we out the earth is shock
so hard that we even can not stand.

Broken English aside, it's scary thinking of our Kevin being thrown to his feet as he and his classmates watch their school building tremble. My prayers go out to the individuals and families caught in the destruction.

As We Speak...

2008-04-30T15:35:00.000-07:00

Kate is, as of the very writing of this post, getting her cast sawn off and the pins yanked out of her elbow. All should go well, but I'm a bit distracted thinking about it.

It's been an interesting six weeks, and I've been so impressed by Kate's endurance and good naturedness about it. She only used her cast as a weapon a handful of times.

I've also been touched by her sisters' empathy (Sam doesn't seem to care). Genna only used Kate's cast as leverage to throw her to the ground a couple of times.

Here is Julia expressing her solidarity with her big sister. I'm not sure what the headband is all about, but I'll chalk it up to her being cute (along with her Tinkerbell dress).

A Novel Idea

2008-04-16T21:12:00.000-07:00

Some of you have read it. Some of you are reading it. And the rest of you will have to wait until it becomes an international best seller (unless you receive one of the coveted copies below).

I'm wrapping up the final edits to my first novel manuscript (working title, Outremer). Below is a shot of several copies I had printed for editing purposes. Note the beautiful cover, one of my brother-in-law (Brian Swisher)'s creations.

Now begins the tedious, laborious, tortuous, and noxious effort of finding a literary agent who will give me the time of day. The odds of me actually getting it published would make a compulsive gambler push back from the table, but I'm going to give it a go.

In the words of Miracle Max and his wife: "Think it'll work?" -- "It'll take a miracle."

I'm sitting here with a chocolate-covered walnut in my mouth, so I'm hoping for the best.

Narnia II

2008-04-15T14:10:00.000-07:00

What's all this talk about Narnia 2, Prince Caspian?

I thought Ian said that Narnia 2 involved Predator, Snuffy, and Sadam.

Dos and Dos at Dos

2008-04-11T06:59:00.000-07:00

There was a massive gathering of family at Dos Coyotes earlier this week to see Becky off as she and her husband and new baby make their way back to Missouri to resume a normal home life.

Many, many photos were taken, so I chose the best ones. This first shot is of Sam and Veni (Becky's new baby). Note their matching outfits. I see the beginning of a lifelong friendship here, maybe even a primetime sitcom in the making.

Regarding this second photo, there were 23 photos taken of Sophie and Nora. I scoured them, looking for the best one, for the shot that showed them in the best light.

This was the best one I could find.

Uphill to Masculinity

2008-04-10T20:40:00.000-07:00

This is proof that the road to masculinity for Sam is going to be an uphill battle with so many girly girls around him.

My hope is that with all this adversity, he'll really have to flex his manliness to its utmost, thereby creating some sort of uber-man (dare I say, superman?).

I'm not interfering with my daughters' attempts at feminizing Sam. Instead, I am giving Sam the tools he needs to maintain his identity as a boy. This includes roundhouse kicks, munitions knowledge, wilderness lore, training in Israeli Krav Maga, and how to configure a PC in under two minutes. These skills, coupled with feats of strength, grappling techniques, and knowing how to pee while standing should be all he needs to foil his sisters.

Frankenkate

2008-04-01T11:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Kate's follow up appointment for her broken arm surgery. You'll see in the x-ray to the left that the staff accidentally used sandwich toothpicks in place of pins to keep all the parts together.

Annie and Kate got to see the heads of those pins sticking out once the doctor removed Kate's splint, and it was...Frankensteiny (the mound around the head of the pins is from the splint, not her swelling. Or maybe it was bionic...I see a TV show in the making. I'll contact Nickelodeon.

Everything is healing just fine. The doctor was pleased with Kate's progress. After cleaning the wound up, the doctor elected to put a cast on in place of another splint. Kate was hesitant at first, but as you can see, she enjoys the hot pink.

The cast and the pins will be removed at the end of the month. That will be the best fifteen minutes of Kate's life. Nothing like pliers and saws to make your day. That reminds me, the Inquisition called, and they want their training manual back.

Gmail's New Service

2008-04-01T11:10:00.000-07:00

Gmail is offering a new service as of today, April 1. You can send up to 10 pre-dated (choose whatever date or time your want) emails per year, going back to April 1, 2004, and even mark them read or unread. If they allowed you to do more, you would distrupt the universe's space-time continuum. Thankfully, they are using their e-flux capacitor to "resolve the issue of causality."

Check out the link above and read the testimonials.

I knew Google would be the first to invent time travel, even if it is only for email.

Revelatory Easter

2008-03-27T20:49:00.000-07:00

Easter at my folks' place was revelatory in regards to Kate, Genna, and Julia's nature.

Let me explain, no that will take too long. Let me sum up...

Kate (post-op, with the splint and sling), cruised the area where the easter bunny had left his chocolatey nuggets with delight. She, however, had interest in only one thing: candies that were wrapped in pink foil. She passed up mounds of other candies in her search for pink. Look into her bag for proof.

Julia, once told she could start hunting, paused after the first candy, unwrapped it, and stuffed it in her mouth. It took constant encouragement to have her take a break from eating the candy to go find more.

This short-sighted behavior is typical of two-year-olds (sheesh, almost three now). It's also typical of a girl who has an insatiable sweet tooth and lack of regard for herself (as seen in her willingness to climb anything, jump off anything, and unwillingness to hoard candy for future-Julia).

Look into her bag and you'll see lots of empty wrappers and bits of torn foil.

Genna grasped the purpose of the egg hunt with gusto. Telling her she could begin the hunt was like opening up the gates at a rodeo and letting the mad bull into the arena. She charged about, not discriminating as to color, and not bothering to eat. Her sole purpose was to ransack and pillage like a swarm of locusts, like the vikings of yore.

I was able to have her pause for this picture, and you can see that her eyes are wide and her pupils are dilated, like a lioness caught midstride as she charges a herd of wildebeests. That semi-smile is one of frenzied satisfaction.

You'll also note that her bag is the fullest.

We as a family have been steadily consuming the easter bunny's offerings. Kate and Julia's supplies have been nearly tapped out. But Genna's supply will take quite some time to exhaust.

Post-Op Kate Update

2008-03-24T11:49:00.000-07:00

I'll have pictures posted once I get my computer set up (we just moved), but I wanted to give you all a quick update.

Kate is doing very well. The surgery lasted almost three hours, which was quite a bit longer than they told us. That, combined with watching our little four-year-old being wheeled away in a hospital bed by a bunch of strangers in scrubs, made for a stressful morning. But, in the end, all went well. Kate now has four pins in her elbow, and all the bone pieces fit together like a puzzle. The doctor said that Kate has "every chance of a full recovery."

She didn't end up with a pink cast. The doctor opted to put her back into a splint, since a cast requires a scary saw to remove it. Kate doesn't seem to mind. In six weeks she'll have to go in to get the pins removed (a 5 minute ordeal) and then she'll be splintless.

Kate took a good hour to come out from the disorientation caused by the anesthesia, but within twenty four hours she was walking around, and within forty eight she was dancing and singing and fighting with her sisters. All is back to normal, relatively speaking.

Thanks for all your prayers and well wishes.

Kate Update

2008-03-20T15:00:00.000-07:00

It turns out that the nature of Kate's broken arm wasn't properly reported to us by the ER staff during her initial visit.

The follow-up meeting with orthopedics revealed that her fracture isn't a minor one to her radius. Rather, it is a significant one to her humerus, on a growth plate. That being the case, Annie and I are taking her in for surgery tomorrow morning to have two pins drilled into her bone. The procedure will last about an hour, and Kate will awaken to a full arm cast, mommy and daddy, and several princess DVDs to occupy her time.

It's a routine procedure, and unless I am wrong--and I am never wrong--all should go well. But your prayers are appreciated.

Will update.

A Trip to the ER

2008-03-17T06:56:00.000-07:00

These photos of Kate were taken around midnight last night, just after Annie and I brought her home from the ER.

Earlier in the evening, she and her sisters and Sophie thought up a (brilliant) game involving jumping off the coffee table in unison. We had some (very obvious) misgivings about this, but before we were able to put a halt to it, the four girls went for one last jump. After they landed they all rolled away giggling, except for Kate, who began emitting an ear-splitting shriek.

Kate's a tough cookie, so we knew something was very wrong. I scooped her up and tried to soothe her. But within minutes, her left arm was swelling at the elbow. Though Kate soon calmed down, we knew that we were destined for the ER.

Kate was a trooper through all of it. She didn't cry again, despite the poking and prodding and being carried around and X-Rays. In the end, the Kaiser staff verified that she had a 'green stick' fracture of her left radius at the elbow. It would require immobilization and a follow-up visit for a cast (Kate already plans to have a pink one).

In the meantime, their phenomenal (he really was fantastic) orthopedic technician splinted her arm and supplied her with a dinosaur-themed sling. We were in and out in two hours, a possible world record for an ER visit.

Annie and I were very conscious through it all that the three of us were experiencing a moment that we will ever after refer to as "remember when Kate broke her arm..."

Brian and Chris, who had been over for dinner, stayed behind to man the fort and watch the kids. Thanks you two.

This whole event has supplied Annie and I with the perfect cautionary tale for the kids as they grow up. The next time they jump from furniture, we'll drop a "Remember how Kate broke her arm?" Or, if they get too rowdy on the bunkbed, "Kate's arm, remember?" If they start mouthing off or won't finish their peas, I'll point to Kate's arm. Now that is making lemonade out of a lemon.

You'll note that, throughout the entire ordeal, trusty horsey never left Kate's side.

Sitting Sam

2008-03-14T07:09:00.000-07:00

Sam has been sitting up for a few weeks now. I decided to ge the camera down to his level and see the world as he sees it. Instead, I ended up seeing a Sam-centric world as I see it when at his level. It worked out just fine.

Enjoy.

Admit It

2008-03-12T07:06:00.000-07:00

Look at the boy, all freshly woken up. Look at him with his comfy pjs and his fluffy blanket and the attendant blue bear. See those fists and those sleepy eyes? You want to snuggle Sam, admit it! Looking at this picture makes me feel drowsy. I want a blue blankey and bear of my own. A port-a-crib would be nice too.

Catastrophe

2008-03-06T07:09:00.000-08:00

We had a catastrophe on our hands a couple days ago.

Kate lost horsey.

While at Sears getting Sam's photo taken, horsey became MIA. A Search and Rescue team was assembled and dispatched at once, consisting of Grandma and Auntie Kelly. Their only lead: Kate reported that she last saw horsey in a blue cart. That meant any cart in Sears.

Grandma and Kelly scrambled, first checking the outside carts. But there were only two, and both were empty. That meant that the horsey-holding cart had been taken inside by a customer. Bad news. They made their way inside and contacted the Sears staff, but there was no horsey in Lost and Found. More bad news. Undaunted, the team penetrated deeper into Sears with the mission of checking every blue cart in sight.

They had just given up hope when Kelly approached an abandoned cart in the middle of the store. There, all alone, rested Kate's precious horsey.

Catastrophe was averted by the quick action of Grandma and Auntie Kelly.

Now, Kate has a lot of stuffed animal friends, as evidenced by this photo. But if you look at either of them, you'll see horsey's pink, dingy rear end on the top of the heap in Kate's lap. Even amidst so much competition, horsey is always close at hand.

If you see Grandma or Auntie Kelly on the street, be sure to congratulate them on a job well done.

Metamorphosis

2008-03-04T07:02:00.000-08:00

Look at this picture. Do you see Genna anywhere? I'll bet you don't.

When I went looking for her, all I could hear was laughter and squealing, and protestations that she wasn't in the toy bin. I believed her, so I looked all around the room. I still couldn't find her.

And then, much to my amazement, she emerged from the very toy bin she claimed not to be in! How did she do that?

But it wasn't Genna that emerged. No, what emerged from the chrysalis that is the toy bin was Genevieve Grace Lindsay the Tricker. That is her new, self-appointed title. And it turns out that this new being is quite the tricker.

Genna will come up to us and announce that she hasn't brushed her teeth, but she actually had! And no, she hadn't picked up the play room, but she actually had! She gets us every time.

Annie and I don't mind these treacherous dealings at all. Each time she tricks us, it turns out she did do everything we asked her to do.

On the other hand, Julia has become Julia Violet the Tricker. Only, she claims to have brushed her teeth, and she hasn't. And she claims to have picked up the playroom, and she hasn't. This trickery isn't nearly as productive.

Fotosketcher

2008-02-26T08:49:00.000-08:00

I've posted this photo before, but not doctored like this. There's a great website called Fotosketcher.com, and they offer a free software download that allows you to render your photographs as if they had been sketched.

I know that you photoshop users may not be impressed, but for us povs who can't afford it (or won't used pirated copies), software like this is a joy.

Kate on the Floor

2008-02-22T09:23:00.000-08:00

I've been hard on Kate's sleeping positions (like when her arms are behind her as though she's been handcuffed). So, in the interest of fairness (fair and balanced), here's what she looks like when she naps on the playroom floor. How cozy is that? Look at those rosey cheeks! Look at all those princesses. Look at how her joints are all bent in normal positions.

Making Arrangments

2008-02-20T09:05:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite things about being a parent is walking into a room and seeing scenes like these. You just wonder what's going through your daughters' heads as they arrange their toys.

I can only assume that the princesses dangling from the handles of my buffet are on display as an offering for a toy king kong.

Sleeping Comparison

2008-02-12T07:04:00.000-08:00

Could you ask for a more peaceful scene than this? Genna, wrapped in her blanket, head on her princess pillow, her hands tucked beneath her cheek, piggy close by, and a spread of books around her (toe nails polished). I just want to curl up beside her and go to sleep.

But then you come across Kate and are confronted with her double (triple?) jointedness. How do her shoulders fold to enable her to sleep with both of her arms behind her? I'm afraid some gypsy circus is going to rumble by and enroll her to one of their shows.

Sam, the Ladies, and the Submarine

2008-02-08T11:55:00.000-08:00

You've probably noticed that Sam hasn't featured prominently in my Disney posts. What do you expect from a five month old?

But just in case you were wondering what he was up to, here's a sampling.

He was busy charming the ladies (in waiting). But not charming their pants off, just their hats.

And though he was more concerned with placing everything he could in his mouth, he was quite entertained by the antics of the Finding Nemo cast in the Finding Nemo submarine ride. I think these photos need to be used in Disney advertisements. Anyone know an agent?

Exhaustion and Poses

2008-02-06T15:07:00.000-08:00

What were the kids up to when not viewing princesses?

By and large, they were sleeping (or in the process of nodding off). Here we see the twins being carted about in the double jogger. Genna has succumbed to her exhaustion, while Kate maintains her vigil. She will not miss a minute of it. Horsey can attest to that.

Julia and Sam were troopers, but their little metabolisms couldn't keep them alert the whole time. Julia is looking spritely in her piggies, while Sam's (in the back of the stroller) bald head affords him no such style.

Kate wanted to pose for me. This is the smile she struck while we waited for the princess dinner.

Genna, too, wanted to have the camera commemorate her. She chose the classic pursed-lip-and-cross-eyed look. Can't beat that.

Astroblast

2008-02-01T07:07:00.000-08:00

We served several tours of duty for Buzz Lightyear, operation code name: Astroblast. Emperor Zurg was our target each time. Operational satellite photos were taken of some of our missions.

In this first photo, you'll notice my mom manning the craft, with Kate and Julia serving as copilots. Mom seems to be trying to work the weapons system, and Kate as an observer. But their 'scores' (kill rankings) leave much to be desired.

These next to photos are of me with my copilots. You'll notice my intent gaze and masterful use of the blaster. You'll also notice how much my score improved. My copilots, however, didn't add much in the way of firepower. In the second photo, I've even taken off my coat, to be all the more unencumbered and lethal. That is dedication.

(where are these cameras by the way? I didn't even know they were taking any shots...and I feel like a dork, even if a valiant dork)

And then we have Andrea. Kelly seems to be enjoying the battle, along with Julia. But Annie, well, she and Sam haven't even bothered picking up their blaster. Instead, she seems to have spotted the camera and stares back in derision. Do you care nothing for galactic peace, Annie?

Time with the Princesses (again)

2008-01-31T12:16:00.000-08:00

One of the definite highlights for the girls was their second time through meeting the princeses. This time, they got to meet Belle, Jasmine, and Mulan. The girl escorting us through the line was so enchanted my Julia and her pirate shirt, that we received a bit of special attention. Belle then became so enthralled by the girls, that we got to spend quite a bit of time with her.

So much time, in fact, that Jasmine was left with no one to visit, so she came over and joined in on the fun. And as you can see, the princesses enjoyed being pirates for a brief moment (see their hook hands). It must be nice taking a break from your royal duties and pretend to be the embodiment of the criminal forces you are trying to hard to fight.

In all, we were given almost 10 minutes alone with the princesses, much to the dismay of the parents and children waiting in line behind us.

The Girls and Aladdin (and Jasmine)

2008-01-25T06:56:00.000-08:00

At Alan's suggestion, we took the kids to see the Aladdin story, performed by live actors. We got to the show (in Adventure Land) a good half hour early, which turned out to be for the best. Here's a shot of us waiting to be let in.

Kate is staring in wonder at her over-priced lollipop, Julia is contemplative, and Genna is looking askance at the woman smiling at her.

Just as Alan said, the show was fun, and worth the wait. Afterwards all the children were allowed to get in line to get one--one and no more!--photo with the royal couple. Jasmine, of course, was very nice. But Aladdin, well, you know what they say: you can take the diamond in the rough out of the streets, but you can't take the streets out of the diamond in the rough. He tried to pick pocket me twice.

Down to Disney Business

2008-01-21T12:09:00.000-08:00

We spent last weekend at Disneyland with my folks. It's our annual trip. And, at least for the girls (and Annie and I, by default), it is a princess-filled event. So let's get straight to business.

One of the highlights of the trip was the dinner with the princesses at Ariel's Grotto (California Adventures). You're given 80 minutes to dine on a four course meal, and...drum roll...be visited by princesses.

Your first encounter with with Ariel herself. She awaits you (as does an enormous crew of photographers and serving staff) at the base of the stairs, just before being seated. She's a good sport. Evidently, the rigors of running a kingdom (Eric's a slacker) and maintaining good relations with her father's realm, still give her time to visit with us povs (Sam, as always, was more interested in his fists than with the person holding him).

But it is during dinner that the fun really starts. One by one, the princesses are introduced. They wind their way through the tables and give each of the children attention.

Here are some of the highlights...

First we have the orphan-turned-princess, Cinderella. She's doing quite well, and was in fine spirits. She was even willing to share some of her regal authority (in the form of crowns) with my dad and Kate. So generous (so much like a princess...)

Next we had Belle make an appearance. She was very kind and sweet, but had to cut her visit short when she received a terse text message from the Beast.

Sleeping Beauty also graced us with her presence. She even knelt down so the girls could sit in her royal lap. When my brother tried to join in, she shooed him away (again, very princess-like).

Last, but not least, the fairest of them all came by. She, too, knelt down, and she, too, had to rebuff my brother's untoward advances. Someone's got to put a leash on Jared...

Air

2008-01-13T07:02:00.000-08:00

A while back we spent the afternoon with my family at Mt. Diablo. In addition to the picnic and hiking and visiting, I did some good ol' fashioned child throwing.

Kate was first. I was able to get some decent air with her.

But then it was Julia's turn. She weighs quite a bit less. And it shows. You'll note that Annie is in the first photo, but not the second. She couldn't countenance such behavior (though the girls sure could).

Sam at Four Months

2008-01-08T07:09:00.000-08:00

Come on people, does it get much cuter than a four-month-old Sam smiling for the camera in a moose-motif sweater vest? I daresay it doesn't. Check out that perfectly proportional dome! That is symmetry, my friends.

They Did Like Each Other

2008-01-03T07:08:00.000-08:00

Here are the girls at Dillon Beach. More specifically, on top of the hill above Dillon Beach, bundled up against the cold. When they reach their teenage years, I'm going to pull out this photo as proof that they once did really like each other.

Oakland Temple Christmas Lights 2007

2008-01-01T21:45:00.000-08:00

These are photos from our annual trip to see the Christmas lights on the Oakland Temple. This year I came equipped with a brand-new Pentax DSLR, a tripod, and my new (thanks mom and dad) telephoto lens.

Here are the results. I think they speak for themselves. Click on any of the photos to see it enlarged.

Almost Done

2007-12-31T07:12:00.000-08:00

This is my second-to-last post involving Christmas photos (that's a hint to stay tuned...).

To the right you'll see our requisite kids-in-Christmas-garb-in-front-of-tree shot. You'll note the girls' delight in grappling a less-than-happy Sam, restraining him (red faced though he might be) for daddy's omnipresent camera.

Enjoy your physical dominance while you can, little girls. I suspect Sam might one day be able to fight back.

This last shot is of all (well almost all) of the Walkers and Walkers-in-law and chitluns out caroling. Specifically, this is on the Ostrom's doorstep. It's a large crowd, and thankfully the ladies are adept at keeping a tune. You'll see that Christine is at the center of the photo. What you might not see is that she is sitting at a Casio keyboard. That's right--she and Brian carted around the Casio to up the caroling ante. Now that is Christmas spirit (psychosis).

Massages

2007-12-28T06:57:00.000-08:00

This one is a few months old, but I love the sequence (and I have some catching up to do). Annie was fast approaching the ripeness of full term pregnancy, so Chris and Brian decided to help things along with a good ol' fashioned ankle massage. Can't you see Christine's wicked expression?

Julia was intrigued by the process and climbed into Annie's diminishing lap. Brian then treated her to her own massage. She loved it.

She loved it so much that she decided to pay it forward and offer her mommy a leg rub of her own. Here she is smiling her heart out as she rubs her hands together to warm them up. Little did Julia know that within a few days time, she would cease to be the baby in the family. Sam was en route.

Come and Gone

2007-12-26T12:38:00.000-08:00

Santa has come and gone, but I thought these photos were too good to pass up. I know there are roughly 4.5 million blogs with pictures like this on them right now, but my girls lend the whole event an extra dose of cuteness.

For once, no one cried, though Kate was shy. Genna asked for a Pocahontas dress (which mama later provided), and Julia announced that she was going to be a witch, a skeleton, and a cat for Halloween (she has her holidays mixed up). Santa took it all in stride.

Merry Solstice

2007-12-21T08:41:00.000-08:00

Sam, whether bibbed and bibless, would like to wish all of you a Merry Solstice. As an infant, he cannot quite grasp the profundity of Christmas. He has, however, noticed the lengthening nights, which equates to more sleep (thank you, circadian rhythms). That is a concept even someone with poor motor skills, a lack of self-awareness, and a drool-soaked chin can grasp.

The winter solstice is a bittersweet moment for Sam (and his parents). It marks the best night for sleep, but, as the low-water mark for day light hours, it serves as a harbinger for shorter nights to come. Or, as Sam puts it, "blppppt, gggggooo. BLPT."

At the Beach

2007-12-20T08:10:00.000-08:00

These beach photos seem a bit out of place in a December post, but they are recent. We took the kids to the beach last month for our wedding anniversary and had a blast, despite the best efforts of the fog and the driving wind.

Our first beach encounter involved hundreds upon hundreds of beached and rotting jelly fish. I had Julia squat down next to one to give a sense of proportion. She ended up eating three of them before we could stop her.

Despite the damp cold, the twins had no qualms about entering the surf. Genna quickly took up her sea sprite dance. Once she was done with that, Kate and Genna enjoyed a good hour of running from the surf and screaming, chasing the surf and screaming, falling down and screaming, getting back up and squealing, splashing each other and squealing...

... and then resting in quiet contemplation.

They sat for quite some time side by side, deep in conversation. I don't know what they were talking about, but no doubt it involved princesses, rainbows, the war in Iraq, jewelry, environmental conservation, Polly Pockets, unicorns, and immigration policy.

Eat Your Heart Out, Griswald

2007-12-14T15:19:00.000-08:00

For years now, my dad has labored for hours and wracked up obscene utilities bills each Christmas season to bedeck the family house with Christmas lights and ornamentation to bedazzle drivers-by. Each year he has upped the ante, adding more lights, reindeer, over-sized Christmas presents, a star high on the antenna (visible from I80), and even a penguin sailing scene (you saw what I wrote, a penguin sailing scene). This year he even got his hands on a 40+ foot lift to assist in his madness. In recent years, he has earned an honorable mention in the Davis Enterprise's Christmas lights competition, even showing up on the map of places to see.

But now, for the first time ever, my dad has earned FIRST PRIZE in the Christmas light competition! He got interviewed by one of the paper's reporters. He is the best! Top dog! Every other house pales (dims?) in comparison. Now doubt he will soon appear on the Today Show, and Good Morning America, and Larry King Live, and MTV's Cribz.

I urge all of you who live nearby to drive by his place (at night time, silly) to admire, ooh and ah, and leave donations in his mailbox.

Well done, dad. Clark Griswald never had anything on you.